daddy's been really nice to me ever since i came to cjc. almost everyday picking me up from school. same for today. i waited for daddy since he said this morning he will be fetching me. now i feel really bad. bcoz i keep failing my tests. i failed my gp for the second time. didn't improve from my previous essay. thankfully it didn't get worst. phew. i hate school when it ends late. so little time left for myself. esp today. after maths lecture. there was maths tutorial. bio prac. chem tutorial. makes my mind super drained and exhausting. i'm totally sick of jc now. ytd was chatting with my friend who went to RP to do bio-medical course. and i couldn't believe it. she doesn't have any homework at all till now. they do communication skills, presentation skills and all in poly. and since i feel i'm a more practical person that's why i can see how much i would have to slog out even to pass a subject. to me studying in jc is like mental torture. before i could fully understand something. the tcr would alr be on another topic. what to do? i've always been slow in learning. that's my nature. how unfortunate. i envy people who excel in studies. but i know i can never be like them. i've always wanted to show ppl that i can make it. but i end up achieving nothing. i'm just a nobody in this world awaiting to die. i try to be happy but some things aren't always the way you want them to turn out. how i wish ppl could lower their pride and sharpen their humility. mich. thanks for the sweets you gave me today. though it'l make me grow fat but later on i'l still eat them. shall try to finish. i'm not good with words. but i did thank you jus now. actually i don't deserve anything oso. heh. it's three more days to my gp exam. if i fail. that's the end. i won't get promoted anymore i think. unless i do extremely well for final year. which is like so super impossible. i never spoke a single word to les today. kinda unbelievable. i'l be like that till god knows when. i'm broke but i still put Y for class jersey for the second time. the first time round i didn't. that i admit. i don't know what name and number to choose. my mind's in a super lost state now.

rejected at ...
7:01 PM

---

my profile
christopher
11 april '88
ex-sji
cjc
republic polytechnic
cyborg_bug@hotmail.com

likes

music
eating
cycling
swimming
badminton
to be loved

dis-likes

studying

my wishes

a new hp
mp3 player
taller [1.75]
a brand new life
soul - mate

the past
November 2004 December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006

_ links _
[ x ] alison
[ x ] aloy
[ x ] ann
[ x ] calin
[ x ] candice
[ x ] cariann
[ x ] claudio
[ x ] cornelius
[ x ] daryl
[ x ] elena
[ x ] eugene
[ x ] eric
[ x ] gabrielle
[ x ] hazel
[ x ] isaac
[ x ] jacqueline
[ x ] jasmine
[ x ] jenna
[ x ] jeremy
[ x ] jeslyn
[ x ] jiawei
[ x ] jolene
[ x ] joyee
[ x ] klara
[ x ] michy
[ x ] peiting
[ x ] rebecca
[ x ] sabrina
[ x ] serwee
[ x ] tina
[ x ] wuyuan
[ x ] weixin
[ x ] xiaohui
[ x ] yuzhen


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i will never forget
the days we once had.
the days when you were
everything to me.

my mind used to tell me that
we'd be together forever.
but now i realize that was
all a big dream.
which makes my heart shatters into a million pieces.

i sometimes wonder if you,
still think of me
and love me or if to do
i'm just a face in a crowd.
i wish so very much that one day
we can have it all back.
but for now, i sit here silently
remembering all the memories we once shared.
hoping that one day you
will feel the same and
put back the pieces of my
broken heart.

your existence is what makes
mine.
now. if love is painful and
tortures us so..
why do we love? why is it
all we search for in life?
this pain, this agony?
why is it all we long for?
this torture,this powerful
death of self?
maybe because its love

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