Tuesday, May 24
daddy's been really nice to me ever since i came to cjc. almost everyday picking me up from school. same for today. i waited for daddy since he said this morning he will be fetching me. now i feel really bad. bcoz i keep failing my tests. i failed my gp for the second time. didn't improve from my previous essay. thankfully it didn't get worst. phew. i hate school when it ends late. so little time left for myself. esp today. after maths lecture. there was maths tutorial. bio prac. chem tutorial. makes my mind super drained and exhausting. i'm totally sick of jc now. ytd was chatting with my friend who went to RP to do bio-medical course. and i couldn't believe it. she doesn't have any homework at all till now. they do communication skills, presentation skills and all in poly. and since i feel i'm a more practical person that's why i can see how much i would have to slog out even to pass a subject. to me studying in jc is like mental torture. before i could fully understand something. the tcr would alr be on another topic. what to do? i've always been slow in learning. that's my nature. how unfortunate. i envy people who excel in studies. but i know i can never be like them. i've always wanted to show ppl that i can make it. but i end up achieving nothing. i'm just a nobody in this world awaiting to die. i try to be happy but some things aren't always the way you want them to turn out. how i wish ppl could lower their pride and sharpen their humility. mich. thanks for the sweets you gave me today. though it'l make me grow fat but later on i'l still eat them. shall try to finish. i'm not good with words. but i did thank you jus now. actually i don't deserve anything oso. heh. it's three more days to my gp exam. if i fail. that's the end. i won't get promoted anymore i think. unless i do extremely well for final year. which is like so super impossible. i never spoke a single word to les today. kinda unbelievable. i'l be like that till god knows when. i'm broke but i still put Y for class jersey for the second time. the first time round i didn't. that i admit. i don't know what name and number to choose. my mind's in a super lost state now.
rejected at ...
7:01 PM